If we go that route, I am pretty sure I need Jason Statham.
Lmao I was going to post this same picture, first thing I thought of when I read “elder law attorney”!
Thought it would be a big fight but it wasn’t at all, I’ll be set up as a guardian asap. Also thought it would be an even bigger fight, but got him to agree to get checked out for dementia, then got my mother to agree to go along (she has refused for years).
If others are struggling to get their parents checked out for that, particularly a football fan, here’s my script:
“I’ll start by saying I don’t think you have dementia. That said, you know how in a football game when a guy gets hit in the head, he’s not allowed to say he’s ok, the coach isn’t allowed to say he’s ok, and even the team doctor on the sidelines isn’t allowed to say he’s ok - the NFL says nope, sorry dude, you got hit in the head, you’re getting checked out by the league concussion doctor?”
He laughed and said yes.
“Well you think you’re ok and I think you’re ok, but after something like this I think you should get checked out anyway just to make sure.”
He agreed. Then I just suggested she do it too, they can do it together. Done deal.
12 Likes
Do you need a will? Do you want to set up a guardianship for an elderly loved one? Do you want to send their scammer on a no expenses paid trip to Belize? 
Better call Saul!
Do they want you to run their finances and approve all of their expenditures? I know my 78 year old parents absolutely positively do not want that.
No, but they want me to be able to approve anything over a certain amount and/or anything from the 401k.
Kind of impressed you’re even getting that concession. I doubt that level of granular control is available on checking/savings accounts or on like a Fidelity account, but I’m definitely not an expert on any of that.
My assumption would be that these assets would need to be placed into some kind of irrevocable trust with trustees established, which I don’t think is super common for like, individual accounts or non-complex estate planning type stuff without big assets, but I’m absolutely willing to be wrong.
Yeah I’m not sure there’s going to be a great option, the 401k company isn’t even offering any good option. Like none at all.
Again, just going on feels, it seems like the normal progression is once the olds get too far gone they just sort of need to hand the keys to the accounts over to someone with a functioning brain, and they just don’t have the passwords to the bank/investment accounts, they don’t pay the bills, etc. Just chill out and watch the Price is Right.
Maybe they get a debit card (or lolcheckbook) for a checking account with a couple thousand bucks of incidental money in it, but that’s it. Just revert to being a child with an allowance.
1 Like
Yeah what I would ideally set up is an account their pensions and social security flow into that they can control, and nothing flows out of it over the size of their monthly credit card bill. That prevents them from making a fuck up of the size that requires me to fly across the country to save their ass.
Then to get 401k money into it, I need to be involved, and if it’s a big amount I’m going to make sure it’s not for some asshole scammer in Siberia or for Trump NFTs or something, and I need to know what it’s for and when so that I know how long their account they run has more money in it than usual so I can poke my head in every couple days and make sure nothing bad has happened.
Estimated hold time for SSA to report a stolen number and update banking info is 50 minutes. Definitely don’t need more government employees, great work cutting government spending Republicans, only being able to make 8 calls during business hours when trying to clean up a massive shit show from fraud is AWESOME!
Sitting in my parents 3br 1.5ba house, going through papers for places we need to call, my dad holds up his mortgage statement and points…
Oh by the way, this is how much I’m paying a month $800
And this is how much I’m paying in interest 2.25%
Oh by the way son, that monthly payment includes $225 in escrow for taxes, the mortgage is actually under $600 a month.
I just burst out laughing, like I’m already frustrated, angry at the world, and extremely sad about the situation, and he’s inadvertently taunting me about housing prices.
3 Likes
I mean, it sounds like he refi’d right before rates went up, yes? So I assume he has a pretty big chunk of equity and the mortgage is just for a small percentage of the house, right?
You’re going to quickly learn the system for protecting old people who aren’t rich simply does not work and is rife with scams and fraud.
Yeah that’s partially true, and he refi’d it over 30 years. I think he has about half the current equity and also still owes more than he originally paid for it, though. 
shit at 2.25% I would owe money at 90% of the value and be happy.
Yeah it’s bad. Really fucking bad. What’s the better system for protecting old people who are rich? I assume it’s a high priced lawyer setting up trusts that protect assets and shield from taxes?
I would consider allowing my pinky to be chopped off to buy a house at 2.25% right now.
2 Likes
