Man parenting wears me out sometimes. We were excited to have new family in neighborhood over as kids similar age and of course our preschooler is just an absolute complete jerk to them the whole time despite generally being great with kids lol
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I’m currently watching Cinderella because nothing else works and I have no idea what’s wrong, so I get it
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Christ, that’s worse than having to watch Frozen over and over and over and over and over.
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A close family relative has come to live with me as of last night. He is 19. i didn’t know a lot about this til last night, but his mom abandoned them when they were 12 and his dad is a complete deadbeat. What I didn’t know is this kid’s been taking care of himself and couch surfing since he was 14. So, once I found that out, and his home situation wasn’t too good, I told him he could stay here for a few months to re-assess.
We have an end date, so don’t worry about the typical tenant advice people typically give. I covered my bases there and had him sign something that said this was a temporary arrangement, which I explained away as “so my landlord doesn’t cause problems with me” (true but not likely).
So I’m giving him a few months to get settled, find a job, get transportation, and then a place. I can help with all of that. He’s very capable - seems to already have a job lead before he even came here. Places are desperate to hire for 20+ an hour so I have no doubt he’ll find something.
Here’s my question though - how else can I help this poor kid? he’s had it really rough and doesn’t seem to even be aware of how much so. He knows nothing about ANYTHING, and not just like for a 19 year old, but like, a kid from a super neglectful home that only knows what he taught himself about the world kind of way.
I’m lost about it. I want to help but I don’t want to lead him astray. What worked for me (I came from a similar situation) may not work for him in this day and age. I think 3 things he definitely needs right away:
- job LDO
- credit card (to farm rewards and build credit)
- bicycle, ideally electric if he can get a good deal
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my only thought is to get him involved in something social right away. like both of you could join a book club or similar
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Unless he gets a job with health insurance in the next week or so, you should help him sign up online for insurance through the Marketplace (i.e. “Obamacare”).
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If you’re able, once he gets settled you could sponsor a community college course or two to try and get him interested in more education.
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MediCal sign up. Some sort of social circle not filled with shit heads
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he’s pretty adamant about not going to college, forgot to mention that
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through his situation he’s become pretty competent at getting govt aid, he has medi-cal and ebt
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Might want to hold off on encouraging him to get a credit card at least long enough to have a good idea how he would use it. Would hate to encourage him to do something that ends up a liability for him
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WAFFLE news
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Give him a hug daily.
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Did you ever consider watching the video? It’s rough but answers most of your questions. It’s hard to watch without hearing Kevin Harlan do the NO REGARD FOR HUMAN LIFE bit.
The part I’m interested in is when he cavalierly “repositions” the patient by slamming him onto the gurney. Is that a standard operating procedure for transporting a patient? Because I’ll be honest it looked like a wrestling move.
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I had to dig around but here’s the videos you’re referencing:
I just watched the quick one in the link jman posted.
Obviously not but I’m sure he can pass it off as reasonable doubt that it was an unintentional drop. Patients have been dropped much harder with no ill intent. Even though I’m sure it was intentional, and highly disrespectful and unprofessional, that still seems like pretty thin evidence to support a murder charge.
Did he graduate from High School? Can you get him into GED classes? There are all kinds of “adult ed” type classes that you might be able to bet him into, usually offered through either a local community college, or the local government, or other not for profit groups, that could help teach him life skills.
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If you’re in California, the community colleges are a great resource even if he’s not going to ‘college’. They have excellent vocational programs, and they’re about free. Much better than the scam world of vocational education. For example: https://www.ccsf.edu/degrees-certificates/tools-and-trades
I also think a credit card is questionable. Start with a bank account, a debit card, and no fees. Folks I’ve known in his position have lived without a bank account and that’s expensive.
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Today I learned you’re supposed to take a one year old to the dentist.
That’ll be interesting