Hope I get there someday.
I sure hope your parents have something to leave lol. It would really suck if you had to bite your tongue for a few decades just to inherit a few boxes of ornamental ceramics.
Decent chance we have to financially support them at the end, and inherit a fucking time share and pay lawyers to get us out of being stuck with it. Small chance we get like $100K too. They made a series of poor financial decisions their whole life and retired with a $200K nest egg hoping to live off social security. Meanwhile my Dad votes for the side that wants to cut SS because theyāre anti-immigrants, which is extra infuriating since my fiancee is an immigrant.
My guess is with inflation and a couple more bad financial decisions, theyāll run out of money in 4-5 years and weāll have to take care of them.
So why are you being nice? Seems like theyāre the ones who should be walking on egg shells around you.
A combination of them being nice to us overall and being generous with things we canāt afford while they do still have money, and just my father espousing horrible political views sometimes. Weāve definitely gotten into heated arguments over politics a few times in the last year. But, theyāre paying for our wedding. Itās a complicated situation - her parents could never afford it, I mean, they live in Brazil and asking someone who lives there to pay for a wedding here is like asking me to pay for the maintenance on Jeff Bezosā yacht. Weāve actually had to send them money because her step dad is about as good with financial decisions as my father - maybe worse. He loves Bolsonaro, too. Those two would get along great if they could speak to each other.
Anyway, we would never be able to afford a wedding - I mean, we donāt own a house and weād prioritize a down payment over a wedding every time. So the relationship with my parents is pretty complicated on all levels.
This is probably harder than just doing it for most people but if i was in that situation Iād like to think Iād go the boredsocial route.
Thankfully Iām not in that spot, very lucky to have non deplorable parents who have been fairly responsible with their finances. I donāt expect or need an inhertiance from them, they arenāt wealthy or anything but theyāve always been pretty cheap and as far as i know good about saving. Also my dad can fix or build just about anything so a lot of expenses that us normal folk deal with he just handles himself.
Keep the wedding as small as you possibly can. Paying any of the wedding prices is like the antithesis of your whole personality/financial outlook. I spend way more freely than you do, and I got married at the courthouse. That remains to this day one of the better financial moves we ever made.
Getting married is going to be a big memory/day no matter how much or how little material shit there is to go with it. Case in point my wedding day was being 5 minutes late to the courthouse because both my wife and I have ADHD, and eating dinner afterwards at the cheesecake factory with the small group of people who had been at the ceremony to witness it. I still remember what I ordered. Do you know how many vastly superior things I have eaten since 2011 that I straight up do not remember?
Because my marriage has worked out well that entire honestly kind of mediocre day is a fond memory. Every bad/mid thing about it (like us being super sick, late to the courthouse, and the shepherds pie at the restaurant) is transformed into something funnyā¦ because it was the start of something that has worked out well. Iām sure if we had spent a million dollars on the wedding and promptly been miserable the entire memory would be radioactive.
From everything I know about your situation you and the fiance seem to get along great, so no matter what you do itāll be awesome. So with that in mind donāt let any wedding people take your money. This is literally just a party. Get someone to preside over it, hold it at someoneās house, and file the paperwork. Anything but paying anyone who makes a living off of weddings.
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My parents managed to be cheap in all the ways where it costs you more money in the end, horrible at saving, and great at ending up with credit card debt. This taught me a lot by case example of what not to do. There have been numerous points where Iāve been like flabbergasted - both at the time as a teenager and now looking back - by the amount of debt they managed to rack up with basically nothing material to show for it.
Itās going to be ~80 people. Weāre doing our best to stay on the budget they gave us, and not spend any of our own moneyā¦ but weāre going to have to fly her parents and three sisters here and that probably wonāt fit on the budget and will probably cost like $5K. Weāre doing it outdoors since weāre both covid cautious, and that added like $7-10K to the costs right off the top, driving us towards the budget ceiling.
Hopefully the gifts cover a honeymoon with a little bit left over to save towards a down payment.
Unfortunately we just have to do this. Thereās not a nice enough back yard in a house to have it in, and Iām pretty sure the reason my parents are paying for it is that theyād be embarrassed if we didnāt have a reasonably nice wedding - although my read could be off. Theyāre the poorest couple among my momās siblings and everyoneās kids had nice weddings, and tied for the poorest among my Dadās siblings and the one with more moneyās kids also had nice weddings.
Weād rather have the budget as the beginning of a payment, but thatās not an option and we feel like asking for it would be extremely rude and hurt their feelings a lot. So weāre just trying to keep it to the budget while planning an acceptably nice wedding, which is a challenge that has been stressful, and then enjoy the shit out of the day.
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Inconsistent episode lengths. If your show is 45 minutes, make it 45 minutes, donāt randomly throw in a 62 minute episode. 
I canāt remember/canāt find the worst offenders for this, but this is a random selection of recent Netflix shows I watched.
Ozark Season 4: range 50-67, SD 5.21. Grade: D-
BEEF Season 1: range 30-39, SD 2.49. Grade: B-
The Diplomat Season 1: range 50-50, SD 0.00. Grade: A+ NOW THATāS WHAT IāM TALKING ABOUT
Note: If your series finale (or even a season finale) needs to go a little long, this will not be held against you. The Walking Dead finale was very long, Better Call Saulās was just a regular episode. Either way is fine.
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Now do Ted Lasso 
I think Ted Lasso S3 is one I was thinking of, non-finale episodes randomly range from 43 to 69 minutes.
But that whole series is weird, it started out as a half-hour show and just got longer and longer.
EDIT: @goofy
CVs for these are in the same universe, so shouldnāt the grades be closer?
Grades are admittedly subjective. Iām no statistician, but I just looked at the Std Deviation as an initial metric. Moreover, BEEF is shorter in general, so the variance was less noticeable in terms of the absolute number of minutes.
wait why is it important for episode length to be consistent
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Not long enough
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For one thing it fucks up my workout if itās a treadmill show. More generally, if Iām expecting 45min based on previous episodes, then it turns out thereās still 12 minutes left at the point when my brain is expecting things to wrap up, thatās a PROBLEM.
Iāll bet I could sue the producers and get awarded big bucks after testifying about the emotional pain and suffering Iāve been put through due to this issue.
No, thatās not a thing. You donāt need a lawyer. Just donāt accept the timeshare. John Oliver had that part wrong. You canāt get obligated to a land contract through inaction. The executor of the estate, if they are being really responsible, can contact the timeshare management company and offer a deed in lieu, or, you could also just ignore it.
Edit: Also, if they are no longer using it, and want to get rid of it, it is usually not terribly difficult to do so provided they donāt owe a mortgage on it. If that is the case, let me know and I can walk you through it. Donāt ever under any circumstances ever ever ever utilize a timeshare exit company or anyone who charges you an upfront fee. If they owe a mortgage on it theyāre not going to be able to get rid of it easily. If they donāt owe a mortgage on it, depending on the timeshare company, they can either likely give it away for free / cost of closing and/or there may be some small residual value that can allow it to be resold on ebay. Marriott / DVC have decent residual value. Wyndham has no residual value (outside a few low maintenance legacy resorts) but can usually be given away. The only timeshare company that is really challenging is Westgage, because they have no resale value and nobody wants them.
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No. One of the big advantages of a streaming services is that they donāt have to tailor their story telling to some artificial constraint like episode lengths. Let them tell the story without having to leave out anything or add fillers so that they can hit their high point/cliffhanger at exactly minute 43.
Anything that makes a show less predictable is a plus in my book.
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Thatās super helpful, thanks. Itās a much smaller company that nobody has ever heard of, and hopefully this wonāt be an issue for a long time, but that was all good to know!
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